Such a Great Quote

American Chess Player Gets Butt Scanned After Cheating Accusations.

Read the background on this drama somewhere else. Giggle “Niemann Carlsen chess

Regarding the accusations of cheating by getting impulses of an electrical device in his butt, orchestrators of the U.S. Chess Championships apparently took it seriously enough that Niemann had his butt scanned ahead of the tournament.

But here’s the great quote:

Writing for SB Nation, James Dator said the frequency scanner intended to pick up a signal radiating from Niemann’s rectum. Needless to say, the scanner discovered nothing. “I don’t even know how to fathom all this,” wrote Dator. “I can’t even process the decision behind ‘let’s use a frequency scanner to check a player’s rear end.’ I mean, I get it; I just want to be a fly on the wall where a bunch of old-school chess masters were discussing scanning a player’s anus for a microcontroller hidden in anal beads.”

Too funny. In the serious world of international chess, they have taken to butt scans to clamp down on cheating. Who’d a thunk.